one silly little word

Just the other day I was talking with a friend who said to me, “You have had a lot of stress in your life in the past few months.”  Now granted, this gal and I share a lot about the stuff that happens in our lives, good or bad and in return support each other with positive and optimistic viewpoints, however, in this case she was dead wrong.  Despite all of the junk in my life and what others would consider stressful, I don’t have any stress.

I used to though.  Oh, yeah and boy did I ever.   I could write the book on egocentric husbands and their vindictive divorce tactics.  (those are the guys who think you are their personal property)    I lost my beloved parents and  many of my dear companion animals.  I have had children end up in hospitals where I had to hide so that I could cry.   There were days when everything mechanical in the house that could break did in fact break.   The list goes on and on and I am sure that everyone has had those kinds of days and admitted to having stress in their lives.

Bingo!  The problem arises when you admit to being stressed.  Once you admit to something, you own it.  We all have read or heard about the effects that stress has on the body; high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, depression, backache, chronic fatigue syndrome, emotional disorders, colitis and irritable bowel syndrome to name a few.  Therefore, by admitting we have stress we become sitting ducks for all of these horrible illnesses because we know and believe something to be true.

When I found out that I had high blood pressure, I was shocked because my blood pressure normally has always run on the low side.  When I talked to my doctor about this the first thing she asked me was what was going on in my life and was there anything causing me to feel stress.  Well yes there was!    Thankfully, she did not prescribe blood pressure medicine but told me to come back in a month for a re-check.

Two years later, the junk that makes people stressed out still goes on in my life.  And yet my blood pressure is back where it should be…normal to a little on the low side.  And that’s even in the dentist chair which is not a place I have ever felt comfortable. 

So, when my friend told me she thought I was stressed, I stopped her and told her that I do not have any stress in my life.  “Of course you do, look at all that has been happening just in the past few months.”   Nope, no stress. 

It’s just life.   Life is not perfect and comes with many ups and downs.  I could spend my days worrying about something or getting angry and upset  and letting these thoughts eat away at my being or I can do something else.

I can change my thoughts and change my life.  This is the key to removing stress like throwing out the trash.  I do not admit to defeat by stress.  I don’t ever even say the “s” word.  Instead, I say farkeld.  What?  Yes, farkeld.  Silly, huh?

I recently gave a speech, “How to remove stress from your life as easily as throwing out the trash.”  I asked the audience if they ever felt stressed and every head in the room was nodding up and down.   Later, I asked them to make up and write down a silly word on a card I gave them.  At the end of the speech I had everyone pass their card to the person on their left.   That was when I told them,  “From this day forward, you will never use the ‘s’ word again and instead you will be replacing it with the word on the card you receive.”   Well, laughter erupted all through the room.  One gal would now have to say she was snoogled instead of stressed.  The giggles went on and on.

Think about what you are thinking because we are what we think.  

Who doesn’t feels good when you laugh?  Laughter has been scientifically proven to  improve our health and well-being, lowers blood pressure, improves circulation and all kinds of other good stuff.  

Don’t be a victim of the “s” word.  Don’t say it and don’t own it. Regardless of what happens in life, there is nothing that is worth the sacrifice of your emotional and physical health.   Then consider using a silly word instead of the “s” word.  Sure, the crappy circumstances aren’t going to change so fast and there may not be anything we can ever do to change them but we can change the negative effects they have on our health.   One silly little word that makes you giggle can induce a miraculous chemical change in your brain that actually makes you healthier and happier despite the circumstances.

I have had a flippin farkelfull week.  What about you? 🙂

 

Common Courtesy = Good Vibrations

Picture yourself in this scenario.  You are staying in a beautiful and elegant hotel.  In the morning, you get up and go downstairs to get the complimentary breakfast.  Now you are walking to the elevator, coffee in one hand and plate with your bagel and cream cheese in the other.  As you reach the elevator the doors just start to close and all you can do is stick your leg in between the doors to stop them and wait for the guy standing inside the elevator to push the ‘open door’ button…people do that automatically, right?  Of course they do.  I have even been packed into an elevator like a sausage with doors closing when someone in the front saw a person run up to the doors and even they re-opened the doors for another person to squeeze in.   This is just common courtesy.   So, just how common is courtesy?

Back to the elevator and there you are, leg trying to push open the doors, juggling the coffee and breakfast and you notice that the only guy inside the elevator is just looking at you and not doing a thing.  Therefore, the doors shut and as they do you can’t help from making a one word comment, “rude”.   The woman standing next to you who is also carrying a bunch of things tells you that, “he was probably not paying attention”.     You look at her with a bit of disgust and say, “maybe that’s why there is so little kindness in the world today”.  

It’s true.  When we don’t pay attention to what is going on around us we cannot be courteous to others and instead we appear rude and can even put the health and safety of others at risk.  

Who hasn’t at least one time  (accidentally of course) let a door slam into the person behind us because we weren’t paying attention.   Who has had this happen to them?   What is your first thought?   Rude.   But, when the person turns around with a look of regret and apologizes again and again, it makes it okay, doesn’t it?   Notice when you stop and hold the door for the person behind you and they say, “thank you”, it feels good and all of the sudden a smile comes to your face and you say, ‘you’re welcome’.  

Being courteous is a ‘win win’ for good energy.  Who doesn’t feel good when someone is kind to them?  A simple act of kindness by a stranger can even change one’s mood in an instant.   It’s magical.

As an example, I have this thing about grocery lines.  When I have a cart full of stuff and the person behind me is standing there with one item, I just have to let them go ahead of me.  I just have to.  Why?  Because I know how good it feels to have someone show me the same courtesy.  All of the sudden I have gone from thinking about how long it is going to take just to check out one item to smiling and  thinking about how nice people really are.    This is really good stuff!

So, despite the inattentive and rude guy in the elevator or the person driving the truck that wouldn’t let me in the lane for my exit, I am not giving up being courteous to others.   I want those good vibrations because when I give them they bounce right back at me.   

Imagine a world where everyone paid attention.  Awesome, huh?

 

Don’t sweat the small stuff

What are we thinking when we get upset over stupid things?   You know…the clothes piled up on the floor in the teenager’s rooms, toilet seats left up, windows left open, lights left on, empty milk bottle put back in the fridge…whatever.    Sure, these things may deserve some of our attention but not the kind where our blood pressure starts to rise and we get upset.    I have been there.  I would probably have many less gray hairs  if I just shut the door to the teenagers room instead of demanding and reminding and demanding again and again until it was WAR.   What was I thinking?   The sun is shining, the birds are singing and I’m flustered and annoyed.

 Today a good friend of mine departed from her weekend visit here to go home.  I talked to her when she was almost home and she was already fretting about the  mess her husband might have made in the house while she was gone.  I asked her if it was really worth it to get upset about stuff…stupid stuff like magazines on the floor or dishes in the sink? If we are going to use up our energy being upset about something then pick something worthwhile.  But the small stuff isn’t worth it especially after we had such fun over the weekend.  You see, we haven’t seen each other in 30 years so it was a walk back through time and some of the best fun, laughter and silliness ever!

Seriously, getting upset about the little stuff isn’t worth our time or energy.  And who really wants more gray hair?   There are soooo many other things we could be thinking about, doing, planning for that make us happy.  As my awesome and amazing father used to say, “don’t worry about the dishes in the sink…they will still be there tomorrow”.  Ha!

 

Good Intentions

I spoke with my new client today regarding setting up our appointment schedule.    I already had a discovery session with her which was for the purpose of finding out if coaching can help her and if she liked what I had to say.  During the conversation I asked her: “What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning”.  She had already started practicing her morning “good intentions” so that she could start her day with a positive attitude.  I acknowledged how wonderful this is and asked her to do the same thing at night when she went to bed.  I told her how saying these intentions out loud and even writing them down would also increase her positive vibrations even more.

So, today when I called about the schedule for our appointments she told me how all kinds of wonderful things have been happening in her life.  She has been setting her good intentions in the morning and the evening.  She has blocked any interference from negative thinking too.   Yet a few weeks ago, things didn’t look so positive and there were issues of loss and doubt.  Wow….awesome, huh?  She’s already empowered herself and is manifesting what she wants in a couple of weeks! 

Good Intentions are a simple yet true fact of being.   We can never have too many of them.

 

Imagination is more important than knowledge.

This quote by Albert Einstein happens to portray the story of my life.   I have to laugh when I think about how at one point I thought I had missed the boat by not having an MBA or even a BA.  What was I thinking?  Every business I developed  arose from my passion for something I believed in.  I simply followed my dreams and they always came true.  I can’t say there isn’t anything I didn’t do which I wanted to. (except maybe skydiving when I was 15)  I always took risks and never even thought about their negative consequences.   There was no such thing.

So, here I am with my new biz…um, or should a say a few new ones that I am enjoying every minute of.